The issues that were created as a result of living in a traumatic situation where never resolved. If you have an issue and it is fully dealt with and resolved, it is no longer an issue. With trauma the experience (what happen, the events, the emotions) get splintered and stored anywhere and everywhere in the body. Because it is not resolved, pieces of the experience will keep coming up to be dealt with and resolved.When a deer is being chased during hunting season, it has the flight response and runs. If it runs and finds safety, it has a resolution reaction. The deer will shake all over. It gets rid of the adrenaline and has completed the experience in a healthy way. The deer goes back to eating grass. We don’t or can’t do that. So the trauma is unresolved.
Unresolved trauma causes a great deal of pain. People will self medicate to feel better. You can self medicate with alcohol, drugs, scheduling too many activities, workaholic, TV-zoner and and what ever else that takes you out of the pain and into a different daze.
I would like to get you out of that daze and into present time. Lets talk about emotions.
Basically, there are 2 emotions: Love and Fear. Fear is constrictive and Love is expansive. There are many substrates of Love and Fear. Under Fear, you will find emotions like anger, fear, depression, apathy, humiliation, guilt, and shame.
Love holds the space for courage, willingness, hope, love, joy and bliss.
Much of our society is living within the frame work of fear. Listen to the news. Most of the news is about war, famine, pestilence, debauchery, fires and police blotters. One news adage is “If it bleeds it reads”.
Listen to your conversations with others as well as what goes on between your ears. If you are honest with yourself, you will find it is pretty fear based.
How do you get out of the fear emotions? The space between fear and love is pretty vast but traversable.
Many authors have written about emotions and ranked them from most dense low vibrations to light high vibrations. Ester Hicks has the Abraham books. I suggest you read them. David Hawkins had many book, but in Power vs. Force he tells how he ranks emotions.
This is how it may go for you. You find yourself in a situation that you don’t like. You feel that you can’t do anything about it. You have “feelings”. You may find that you create stories or scenarios in your mind in an effort to arrive at a different outcome. Life may be going around and around in a negative circle.
Try to figure out what are the feelings floating around. Is is Fear, or Anger, or Depression, or Guilt, or Shame. There might be more than one, just an FYI. Anger covers fear. If you are angry, you might want to ask yourself of what are you afraid. Depression covers anger. It is not “nice” to be angry. Depression is the opposite of expression. What do you need to express.
You will not be able to move from depression to love in one jump. It is too far a leap. You can move from depression to anger. It might sound odd, but anger is a high vibration and more expansive than depression or fear. If you are angry or enraged, you may need to dump some of that energy.
Ways to release anger include: screaming, beating a pillow, twisting a towel, going on a mad walk or bike ride or swimming etc. You can journal. If you are doing a dump, I would suggest that you write on scrape paper and then burn it. It is not for anybody else to see. Use some therapeutic grade essential oils like lavender and Peace and Calming. See a counselor. There is nothing wrong with talking to someone who can help you.
Moving up from anger, you will arrive at frustration and irritation. Higher yet is neutral. Once you can get yourself to “neutral” it will be easier to move up the scale.
Develop a practice of gratitude. Make a gratitude list. I will talk more on gratitude tomorrow. 🙂
You may think that the same issue keeps coming up and that you have not made any progress. All of these issues will be multifaceted. It gets layered each time you have an experience. And we probably have had hundreds or thousand of like experiences where we layer on emotions.
Ideally we would go back to the first incident and handle that situation. If the first incident is healed most of the subsequent issues would just go away. The first incident for you could have happened while being in the womb. Could be hard to find. So work back piece by piece.
You are worth it!